How many times have you heard this phrase: “Did you hear what I just said?” If you’re like me, you probably hear it more often than you’d like.
Recently I’ve been going through the book Emotional Intelligence 2.0, and one of the things that I’ve found is that I’m not as good at listening as I thought I was. While I’m not intentionally tuning someone out, often I am just too busy and trying to multi-task (often while not being very successful at either task I’m doing!). What this normally looks like is someone will walk into my office to chat about something that I deem as non-critical, so I will try to keep working on whatever I had been working on while still trying to oblige their conversation. And if you’re like me…. this never works well.
Reading Emotional Intelligence 2.0 helped me realize that trying to multi-task when someone else is speaking can hurt your relationship with that person. So, one of the easy techniques I learned was to put my hands together and turn my chair towards the person speaking so I am not as inclined to try to keep working during the conversation.
I have to say, this simple thing has worked very well! Now, when someone walks in my office, I turn my chair slightly away from my computer, sit with my hands together (usually all my fingertips touching like in the above picture), and try to really engage in the conversation.
I’ve definitely not perfected this skill, and sometimes I find myself in other situations doing the same thing, but I am progressing! How about you? Do you ever find yourself doing the same thing? Try this simple technique and let me know how it goes!